- Leading Sire by lifetime yearling average
- Leading Sire by Comparable Index (Quality of Mares) five consecutive years
- Leading Sire of TDN Rising Stars
- $10,000,000 in progeny earnings three times
- 19.1% Stakes Horses from Starters 2008-2014 - #2 in the nation
- 53 Group/Graded SWs - $108-Million in earnings
- 17 G1 winners in six countries - 11 millionaires - two American Classic winners
- 2015: #6 Sire - #3 by Winners - 7 Triple Crown nominees, incl. undefeated Rising Star KHOZAN; #1 Active Broodmare Sire
- 2014: 26 SHs, 9 SWs, $6.8M - Graded SHs in 4 countries
2013: 25 SHs, 10 SWs, $7M - GSWs in three countries
- 2014: Top Juvenile Sire - 17 2YO wnrs, 4 SHs, $1,000,000, incl. Cartier Champion 2YO runner-up CURSORY GLANCE (G1)
- 2014: America's #1 Active Broodmare Sire - 13 SWs, $9.2M
- 2014 Sales: $1,000,000 two-year-old, $625,000 yearling, $550,000 yearling, $525,000 yearling, $500,000 Racing Age filly, $394,000 weanling
- Covering sire on $4,900,000 mare in '13 - Covering Sire on $2,850,000 & $1,325,000 mares in 2014
Distorted Humor has the highest lifetime yearling average in the industry. His three-year yearling average is $290,460 (131 sold), and he's the only stallion to sire a seven-figure two-year-old of 2014 along with seven-figure yearlings in 2013 and 2012. From 2008 to 2012, he bred the best book of mares in the nation, with the highest Comparable Index of any stallion during that span.
His runners comprise a Who’s Who of big-name horses of the past decade: DROSSELMEYER-G1, FUNNY CIDE-G1, COMMENTATOR-G1, ANY GIVEN SATURDAY-G1, FLOWER ALLEY-G1, HYSTERICALADY-G1, BOISTEROUS-G1, et al. In 2014, two-year-old CURSORY GLANCE added her name to that roster, and was runner-up for the Cartier Award as champion 2-year-old filly. Distorted Humor is one of the nation's top two stallions by APEX Index (top 8% earners), which indicates the very top sires of consistent, money-making horses.